So recently I've been flabbergasted by the sheer number of connections my family has with the literary world. These are things I knew but didn't process in conjunction with, "I'm getting a book published," until today.
Today, I'm asking myself questions like: say, can't Well Known Speculative Fiction Author and Old Friend of Mother surreptitiously give copy of ms to Really Huge Fantasy Author she has worked with in the past? Is it appropriate to call Megahuge Literary Fiction Editor and Best Friend of Father and ask him for advice?
Let's not forget Immediately Recognizable and Beloved Historical Fiction Author, who exchanged letters with Grandmother for twenty-some years, nor Genius Historian Non-Fiction Writer (a relative), nor Reference Book Independent Publisher (another relative)!
Husband believes that I have selective vision; alas, he may be right. How did I fail to see this before now? How did I fail to cultivate these connections? I endear myself to myself for being so naive!
The problem is that I have no idea how to be conniving. To be fair to the opportunistic organ of my brain, when in my teens I did wonder aloud whether MLFEaBFoF would consider reading one of my short stories. Sadly, I could not grasp how M he was at the time, and was thoroughly confused when he rejected me out of hand. "Get an agent first," he said. Huh? I thought.
I have since formed the theory that he thought I was querying him. Me! Alas, all I wanted was some good-natured advice, along the lines of You suck versus Keep working.
I require some instruction. Do people really use their connections to get ahead? What about in the publishing world? Would I suck as a human being if I did it? If not, how do I go about it without being a tool?
Monday, November 29, 2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
Ruminations on Tryptophan... Gobble Gobble
Yes. I have done it. Yes. I have managed to eat no more than a regular (if large) dinner at Thanksgiving. Yes. Praise me, for I had:
- Three small slices of dark meat turkey
- Two, maybe two and a half cups of brussels sprouts, I don't even know, that recipe is good
- A small serving of almond green beans
- A cup of stuffing, or if I'm being brutally honest, two
- Lots of gravy, I have no idea, best gravy ever
- Water (!!!)
- NO PIE. NONE. NO PIE. NOT EVEN A TINY PIECE.
Someone brought up tryptophan, because I haven't been sleeping, and I said that you have to eat over a dozen turkeys in an hour to pass out from eating tryptophan, which is true, and uncle said that I must be wrong because every Thanksgiving he feels the effects, and everyone laughed behind their hands a little and aunt confirmed that uncle falls asleep after eating large burgers. And after dessert other uncle joked that he looked this big because he'd just eaten a lot of food and not because he was fat and cousin laughed with him and at him!
And we did the Christmas gift draw, which has a dollar limit and tells you who you buy for this year because otherwise everyone would have to buy presents for everyone else and weather the resulting emotional backgammon and nobody wants that, so we all buy gift cards, and other aunt drew Husband and relative was like, "Uh oh, should we change it?" and I said, "What?" and she said, "Never mind," so that's obviously OK!
And there were no shame sessions! Except for everyone taking jabs at an uncle who gets ribbed on a lot, and at an aunt because she's kind of OCD as well as more successful than any one of her relatives could ever be and apart from during the ride home in the car, and those other tiny incidents (but those we're ignoring because nibbles don't count towards daily calories)!
I stayed up into the wee hours in a guest room with a wrought-iron day bed that screams at you when you lie down, watching Black Friday advertising with intermittent reality television programming hidden underneath, and I discovered that you can order Black Friday deals over the internet.
What's up with that, America? Isn't the point that camping outside a chain store in freezing rain and snow to get to the doors at 4 am or whatever shows your rabid commitment to buying some cousin you've met twice in your entire life a ten dollar shaving set for Christmas and leaving the original sixty dollar price tag still attached? Or buying a CD to put in your five-dollar-limit office White Elephant just so you can be the smug bastard who can guilt trip that poor schmuck who entered the beer can sleeve?
I have just eaten a mini dinner roll smeared generously with gravy. It was worth it.
- Three small slices of dark meat turkey
- Two, maybe two and a half cups of brussels sprouts, I don't even know, that recipe is good
- A small serving of almond green beans
- A cup of stuffing, or if I'm being brutally honest, two
- Lots of gravy, I have no idea, best gravy ever
- Water (!!!)
- NO PIE. NONE. NO PIE. NOT EVEN A TINY PIECE.
Someone brought up tryptophan, because I haven't been sleeping, and I said that you have to eat over a dozen turkeys in an hour to pass out from eating tryptophan, which is true, and uncle said that I must be wrong because every Thanksgiving he feels the effects, and everyone laughed behind their hands a little and aunt confirmed that uncle falls asleep after eating large burgers. And after dessert other uncle joked that he looked this big because he'd just eaten a lot of food and not because he was fat and cousin laughed with him and at him!
And we did the Christmas gift draw, which has a dollar limit and tells you who you buy for this year because otherwise everyone would have to buy presents for everyone else and weather the resulting emotional backgammon and nobody wants that, so we all buy gift cards, and other aunt drew Husband and relative was like, "Uh oh, should we change it?" and I said, "What?" and she said, "Never mind," so that's obviously OK!
And there were no shame sessions! Except for everyone taking jabs at an uncle who gets ribbed on a lot, and at an aunt because she's kind of OCD as well as more successful than any one of her relatives could ever be and apart from during the ride home in the car, and those other tiny incidents (but those we're ignoring because nibbles don't count towards daily calories)!
I stayed up into the wee hours in a guest room with a wrought-iron day bed that screams at you when you lie down, watching Black Friday advertising with intermittent reality television programming hidden underneath, and I discovered that you can order Black Friday deals over the internet.
What's up with that, America? Isn't the point that camping outside a chain store in freezing rain and snow to get to the doors at 4 am or whatever shows your rabid commitment to buying some cousin you've met twice in your entire life a ten dollar shaving set for Christmas and leaving the original sixty dollar price tag still attached? Or buying a CD to put in your five-dollar-limit office White Elephant just so you can be the smug bastard who can guilt trip that poor schmuck who entered the beer can sleeve?
I have just eaten a mini dinner roll smeared generously with gravy. It was worth it.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Infinite Loops
I edit as I write sentences. I edit after I write a paragraph. I edit after I write a page. I edit after I write a chapter. I edit after I write five chapters. I edit when I'm suffering from writer's block. I edit when I feel like I should be doing something but am too lazy to write a chapter. I edit after I write ten chapters. I edit after I write fifteen chapters. From time to time I will sit down with my entire ms and read it straight through, with a red pen ready.
I find mistakes every time - embarrassing mistakes, mistakes I can't believe I made in the first place, awkward phrasing, typing errors, mistakes I wouldn't admit to my mother, mistakes that force me to frantically message those friends who have kindly offered to read the first draft and tell them to stop, right now.
It baffles the imagination. How did they get there? How, for heaven's sake, did they manage to squat there for weeks and months? Did they have camouflage?
Today, I lost 9k words in editing, out of an approximately 50k partial ms. Of those, 3,376 were a chapter I cut entirely (which will soon be gutted for parts). This means that I have lost an entire chapter of useless muck that I never should have written in the first place.
I dread opening my very first published book for the very first time to find a mistake on the first page. Not a typo or a printing error, no -- a genuine error on my part.
I have earned this today.
I find mistakes every time - embarrassing mistakes, mistakes I can't believe I made in the first place, awkward phrasing, typing errors, mistakes I wouldn't admit to my mother, mistakes that force me to frantically message those friends who have kindly offered to read the first draft and tell them to stop, right now.
It baffles the imagination. How did they get there? How, for heaven's sake, did they manage to squat there for weeks and months? Did they have camouflage?
Today, I lost 9k words in editing, out of an approximately 50k partial ms. Of those, 3,376 were a chapter I cut entirely (which will soon be gutted for parts). This means that I have lost an entire chapter of useless muck that I never should have written in the first place.
I dread opening my very first published book for the very first time to find a mistake on the first page. Not a typo or a printing error, no -- a genuine error on my part.
I have earned this today.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Grammar 101: Dialogue and Quotation Marks
Basics
1. A block of one or more entire sentences of stand-alone dialogue is punctuated as normal and surrounded by quotation marks, e.g.:
2. A block of one or more sentences of dialogue with dialogue tags after it - verbs like "said" or "shouted" - is punctuated in exactly the same way, except for sentences that end with a full stop/period that come right before the quotation marks, e.g.:
"But Apple," you say, a bewildered look on your pretty little faces, "question marks and exclamation points end sentences too! Why shouldn't we capitalize the first letter of the dialogue tag when using them, or use a comma instead?"
You're right; they do end sentences. But that's only their secondary function. Historically, their primary function was to indicate emotion. That's why you see sentences in the old Regency classics like this:
This is a technique still used by literary writers today, although it's gone somewhat out of style (to the detriment of the language, I feel).
3. Sentence fragments around dialogue tags are split up with commas. If a comma belongs to a fragment, it goes inside the quotation marks. If not, it goes outside, e.g.:
4. You can mix whole sentences with fragments in the same block of dialogue. In that case, punctuate using the rules above. The main thing you have to remember is that if dialogue makes sense to be in the same paragraph given the context, it belongs in the same paragraph. (There are other rules as well, but this is the most overarching.) E.g.:
Advanced
1. Most people choose to start a new paragraph each time the speaker changes. For the most part, this makes sense. However, a more accurate rule might be, "Start a new paragraph when a new set of actions is happening in conversation." E.g. (-- indicates new paragraph):
1. A block of one or more entire sentences of stand-alone dialogue is punctuated as normal and surrounded by quotation marks, e.g.:
- "Don't give me that, Emmy."
- "Should I mow the lawn today?"
- "Watch out! Watch out for that car!"
2. A block of one or more sentences of dialogue with dialogue tags after it - verbs like "said" or "shouted" - is punctuated in exactly the same way, except for sentences that end with a full stop/period that come right before the quotation marks, e.g.:
- "Shut up. Don't give me that, Emmy," he said.
- "Should I mow the lawn today?" she asked.
- "Watch out! Watch out for that car!" he shouted.
"But Apple," you say, a bewildered look on your pretty little faces, "question marks and exclamation points end sentences too! Why shouldn't we capitalize the first letter of the dialogue tag when using them, or use a comma instead?"
You're right; they do end sentences. But that's only their secondary function. Historically, their primary function was to indicate emotion. That's why you see sentences in the old Regency classics like this:
- And oh! how I longed to tell her the truth about Mr. Eddings.
This is a technique still used by literary writers today, although it's gone somewhat out of style (to the detriment of the language, I feel).
3. Sentence fragments around dialogue tags are split up with commas. If a comma belongs to a fragment, it goes inside the quotation marks. If not, it goes outside, e.g.:
- "What," he said, "are you doing here?"
- "No," she said, "that's not how you clean the lawnmower."
4. You can mix whole sentences with fragments in the same block of dialogue. In that case, punctuate using the rules above. The main thing you have to remember is that if dialogue makes sense to be in the same paragraph given the context, it belongs in the same paragraph. (There are other rules as well, but this is the most overarching.) E.g.:
- "Oh no!" he said. "I've made a horrible mistake."
- "Hello," she said. "My name is Ellie."
Advanced
1. Most people choose to start a new paragraph each time the speaker changes. For the most part, this makes sense. However, a more accurate rule might be, "Start a new paragraph when a new set of actions is happening in conversation." E.g. (-- indicates new paragraph):
- -- Jen stared at him. "You're a thief!" she cried. "Aren't you?"
-- "Er, yes," he said. She crossed her arms, annoyed. "Well," he continued, "I'm not always a thief."
This is something you have to get a feel for, and is quite subjective. The above example could easily be presented in a number of different ways, each depending on the author's desire for a particular emphasis or timing.
2. Use "said", please, or at a stretch, cried (to indicate stress, fear, or volume, not tears - as in "to cry out"). This has been mentioned in almost every online writing tutorial everywhere, and it still stands. Verbs like "gasped" and "stammered" should not be used as dialogue tags. Powerful verbs need to pack their punches on their own.
Even quite successful authors do this; it drives me nuts. Trust me when I say that it's purple prose, almost without exception.
Listen, I know that people yell. Sometimes you have to tell your reader that they're yelling. So do this instead:
We know she's yelling due to the verb in the descriptive sentence and the italics, but unlike poor Edgar, we're not confronted with it directly.
3. Quotation marks are used to show when single words are being discussed as words, rather than as the objects or concepts (ontological objects) they represent, e.g.:
In this case, they don't need commas.
4. When embedding a sentence fragment of a quotation more deeply than just with dialogue tags, use punctuation if it applies to the fragment. Put such punctuation inside the quotation marks. Punctuation that belongs in the outer sentence stays there, outside the quotation marks. E.g.:
Notice that in the second example, the last comma is in place of a full stop/period, because the quotation is embedded.
5. "To quote" is a verb. "Quotation" is a noun. You should never see "a quote"* or make "a list of quotes"*. It's like saying, "I'm making a list of exaggerates!"
6. British people will often refer to quotation marks as "inverted commas".
Long, but not too complicated.
2. Use "said", please, or at a stretch, cried (to indicate stress, fear, or volume, not tears - as in "to cry out"). This has been mentioned in almost every online writing tutorial everywhere, and it still stands. Verbs like "gasped" and "stammered" should not be used as dialogue tags. Powerful verbs need to pack their punches on their own.
Even quite successful authors do this; it drives me nuts. Trust me when I say that it's purple prose, almost without exception.
Listen, I know that people yell. Sometimes you have to tell your reader that they're yelling. So do this instead:
- She yelled at him. "Goddammit, Edgar," she said. "Why the hell did you sleep with her?"
We know she's yelling due to the verb in the descriptive sentence and the italics, but unlike poor Edgar, we're not confronted with it directly.
3. Quotation marks are used to show when single words are being discussed as words, rather than as the objects or concepts (ontological objects) they represent, e.g.:
- The words "dog" and "canine" can refer to the same animal, though their implications differ.
In this case, they don't need commas.
4. When embedding a sentence fragment of a quotation more deeply than just with dialogue tags, use punctuation if it applies to the fragment. Put such punctuation inside the quotation marks. Punctuation that belongs in the outer sentence stays there, outside the quotation marks. E.g.:
- When she told me to "shut my boy mouth", I was shocked.
- "You're crazy, Roger," was always her response, no matter what he said.
Notice that in the second example, the last comma is in place of a full stop/period, because the quotation is embedded.
5. "To quote" is a verb. "Quotation" is a noun. You should never see "a quote"* or make "a list of quotes"*. It's like saying, "I'm making a list of exaggerates!"
6. British people will often refer to quotation marks as "inverted commas".
Long, but not too complicated.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Steady Characterization Under Stress
I haven't seen this discussed anywhere, and I wonder what other writers do when confronted with the same problem.
I let characters build themselves into people. Once I know who they are by writing about them, they take over and dictate what they're most likely to do in a given situation.
Unfortunately, they're still a part of my own head, the little parasites - so when my brain isn't functioning normally, they don't either.
I've been stressed out recently, and my protagonist has apparently become very placid as a result. Perhaps it's because I'm afraid to leak melodrama all over the page...? I don't know.
It brings to mind a more general problem: how the hell do I make my characters consistent? Outside editing helps, sure. My mood will change, OK. Some people write via character sheet, yup. (Although when I do this it results in mannequins that talk, rather than believable characters.)
How do you do it? The best solution I've come up with is to write the way I normally do and then brainstorm with a friend if they spot a problem (which is basically my solution to everything). Is there a better way?
What do other writers think about character sheets? Do they help with maintaining believable characters, or are they just there for continuity's sake?
I let characters build themselves into people. Once I know who they are by writing about them, they take over and dictate what they're most likely to do in a given situation.
Unfortunately, they're still a part of my own head, the little parasites - so when my brain isn't functioning normally, they don't either.
I've been stressed out recently, and my protagonist has apparently become very placid as a result. Perhaps it's because I'm afraid to leak melodrama all over the page...? I don't know.
It brings to mind a more general problem: how the hell do I make my characters consistent? Outside editing helps, sure. My mood will change, OK. Some people write via character sheet, yup. (Although when I do this it results in mannequins that talk, rather than believable characters.)
How do you do it? The best solution I've come up with is to write the way I normally do and then brainstorm with a friend if they spot a problem (which is basically my solution to everything). Is there a better way?
What do other writers think about character sheets? Do they help with maintaining believable characters, or are they just there for continuity's sake?
Thursday, November 18, 2010
The Amazing Vanishing Publisher
I thought that before I continue I should explain that comment I made in the previous post about sort of breaking down last night, especially considering I juxtaposed it with "happy as a pig in mud".
My publisher has kind of vanished.
OK, so you need to know some of the background here: my publisher is the head of a small trade publishing house. She contacted me directly about the novel in question, and didn't care that I was unagented.
You know, I'm a literary writer. I don't know shit from shinola when it comes to fantasy. But she liked it, and she paid my advance, and we were discussing things like initial distribution and cover art via email and then poof! A month goes past, and her website and Twitter go dark. Not deleted (which would send me into a full-blown hair-pulling session), just abandoned.
Husband maintains that she's either (worst case scenario) going under and hasn't got the balls to email her authors about it yet or (best case scenario) is hideously busy.
My publisher has kind of vanished.
OK, so you need to know some of the background here: my publisher is the head of a small trade publishing house. She contacted me directly about the novel in question, and didn't care that I was unagented.
You know, I'm a literary writer. I don't know shit from shinola when it comes to fantasy. But she liked it, and she paid my advance, and we were discussing things like initial distribution and cover art via email and then poof! A month goes past, and her website and Twitter go dark. Not deleted (which would send me into a full-blown hair-pulling session), just abandoned.
Husband maintains that she's either (worst case scenario) going under and hasn't got the balls to email her authors about it yet or (best case scenario) is hideously busy.
Who are you, Apple?
I'm a writer. I write literary fiction. I am in my mid-twenties and I live in the United States.
I started this blog because I just signed a contract to publish my first book, a genre fiction trade paperback, and I want to take people along for the ride.
I also need a place to vent, because I nearly had a full-blown breakdown last night, and nowhere to run but Husband or Cat. Poor Husband shouldn't bear all the burden, and Cat is beginning to look a little thin on top from the demented tear-streaked petting sessions.
I'll also be discussing stuff about the publishing industry, about the art of writing, about the skill of writing, and about trying to earn a living with my fiction.
Getting a contract has sort of opened the fixation floodgates for me; I'm totally consumed by the process and I'm happy as a pig in mud.
I started this blog because I just signed a contract to publish my first book, a genre fiction trade paperback, and I want to take people along for the ride.
I also need a place to vent, because I nearly had a full-blown breakdown last night, and nowhere to run but Husband or Cat. Poor Husband shouldn't bear all the burden, and Cat is beginning to look a little thin on top from the demented tear-streaked petting sessions.
I'll also be discussing stuff about the publishing industry, about the art of writing, about the skill of writing, and about trying to earn a living with my fiction.
Getting a contract has sort of opened the fixation floodgates for me; I'm totally consumed by the process and I'm happy as a pig in mud.
"I've always wanted to be a writer."
Just because I have this itch to say, "I've always wanted to be a writer," to everyone who wants to know something about my career doesn't mean it's a good idea.
Everyone wants to be a writer. At this point it's almost like writing a book is something you do as part of a coming-into-happiness ritual, like some modern alchemy that will make other people think, "Wow, that person is successful and intelligent."
And yeah, if you exaggerate how long you've had the itch, so what? Nobody can prove anything, unless they call your mom and ask.
What I should really say is this: "I've been practicing the skill of writing fiction since I was very young." That's different; that means I've written a lot.
Guys, seriously, you have no idea. A lot. For every short story I bring blinking into the light for people to gawk at, there are ten infinitely more grotesque and malformed hiding away in the dark, rubbing their fingers and drooling. An illustrative anecdote: I learned how to touch-type by writing. These days my fingers are faster than my nitpicky writer-brain.
Please bear in mind that when I say "practice", I mean "actively attempt to improve everything I have ever written until it is beyond my current ability to improve it any more without scrapping it entirely", not "write because it is fun". I mean, it is fun. Demure, methodical fun.
Background information is next, I think.
Everyone wants to be a writer. At this point it's almost like writing a book is something you do as part of a coming-into-happiness ritual, like some modern alchemy that will make other people think, "Wow, that person is successful and intelligent."
And yeah, if you exaggerate how long you've had the itch, so what? Nobody can prove anything, unless they call your mom and ask.
What I should really say is this: "I've been practicing the skill of writing fiction since I was very young." That's different; that means I've written a lot.
Guys, seriously, you have no idea. A lot. For every short story I bring blinking into the light for people to gawk at, there are ten infinitely more grotesque and malformed hiding away in the dark, rubbing their fingers and drooling. An illustrative anecdote: I learned how to touch-type by writing. These days my fingers are faster than my nitpicky writer-brain.
Please bear in mind that when I say "practice", I mean "actively attempt to improve everything I have ever written until it is beyond my current ability to improve it any more without scrapping it entirely", not "write because it is fun". I mean, it is fun. Demure, methodical fun.
Background information is next, I think.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)